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Sentimental yet sardonic [userpic]

Addicted?

January 20th, 2005 (11:54 pm)



All of your friends have an @ in their names.

You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you don't have a clue when it happened.

You kiss your girlfriend's home page.

Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.

All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem...T1...T3.

You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.

Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.

When looking at a pageful of someone else's links, you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.

Your dog has its own home page.

You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.

You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.

Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.

You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.

You don't know the sex of three of your closest friends, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.

Your husband tells you he's had the beard for 2 months.

You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.

You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Mummy's got work to do" and you don't even have a job.

You buy a Captain Kirk chair just because it comes with a built-in keyboard and mouse.

You get a tattoo that says "This body best viewed with Netscape 2.01 or higher."

You never have to deal with busy signals when calling your ISP...because you never log off.

The last girl you picked up was only a jpeg.

You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a toilet.

Your wife says communication is important in a marriage...so you buy another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can IM each other.

As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.


Some of these are uncomfortably close. :D Anyone think of any more?

Comments

Posted by: Gilathief (gilathief)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 04:28 pm (UTC)

When forced to communicate verbally (heaven forbid) you have caught yourself using netspeak.

Posted by: Sentimental yet sardonic (booster17)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 04:48 pm (UTC)
Gospel Booster [jennymalfoy]

Have you caught yourself saying 'lol'? Cause I've come very very close to that....

Posted by: Kaz (kaz814)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 04:33 pm (UTC)

*snerk* There are way too many of those that are familiar. The 'back' button one, unfortunately ... I do try to control-Z non-computer things. *BLUSH*

How about ... when you realize you're going away for the weekend and go out and buy a laptop so you won't be without your computer. (*eyes laptop and whistles innocently* I was gonna get one anyway really ... just got it a bit sooner.)

Posted by: Sentimental yet sardonic (booster17)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 04:47 pm (UTC)
head-desky [lurker32]

Eeep! Buying a laptop solely for that is one thing.....

....one thing that is now very tempting. *head-desk*

Posted by: Kaz (kaz814)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 04:51 pm (UTC)

*giggles* Well now I use it exclusively and at work ... at least that's how I justify it to myself.

It's all about the justification.

*pets my laptop*

Posted by: Kaz (kaz814)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 07:26 pm (UTC)

*blush* Just realized that I didn't ask before I friended you ...

*whistles tunelessly* Yeah sorry about that. I'm normal, I swear! (note the timing of that claim ... absolut_jmo is not here to dispute it. *grins*)

Anyway, sorry ... hope you don't mind. *waves*

Posted by: The itsy-bitsy spider (annibug)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 04:50 pm (UTC)
Banana Issues

When going to visit family you call ahead to find out if they have a cable modem and/or wireless router so you'll know if you need to pack your own, or heaven forbid, a telephone cord.

Posted by: Sentimental yet sardonic (booster17)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 05:00 pm (UTC)
head-desky [lurker32]

Is it bad to admit being annoyed when staying with the parental units at Christmas and they only have dial-up? Particularly, when they insist on you only being online for a little bit because 'people might want to call us at 11 o'clock at night' ?

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

Posted by: HJ (hjcallipygian)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 07:29 pm (UTC)

How about:

You go to a friend's house to watch the Super Bowl (I'm an American), and by the third quarter there are three of you with laptops out, logged on to the wireless network the friend has at his house, sending one another funny links and files you've collected over the past year.

True story.

Posted by: Sentimental yet sardonic (booster17)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 07:46 pm (UTC)
Gospel Booster [jennymalfoy]

I'm British, and I missed the Janet Jackson incident last year because I was out of the room during the halftime show, catching on on LJ.

Booster
Still pissed that his Rams team went out last week.

Posted by: HJ (hjcallipygian)
Posted at: January 20th, 2005 07:51 pm (UTC)

I knew you were British, but I didn't think you'd actually watch the Super Bowl. I think half the people I was with that night were just watching the gave for the adverts. =)

I hadn't started my LJ at that time.

This year, Super Bowl is about five minutes away from my apartment. Literally. I could walk there in no time -- about five blocks over, then over a bridge, then four blocks over. Of course, I'm not going, but it should be weird watching the Super Bowl and seeing where I live. My girlfriend's in the Peace Corps, and apparently everyone is going into the capital of her host country to watch the game.

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