The phone felt heavy in his hand as he replaced it on the desk.
He walked across the room and stood in front of the window staring out into the LA night. The view was pretty good, he noted absently. Definitely a spectacular sight from up here, with all those small dots of light moving along their different paths. She’d liked it. He wasn’t brooding though, he quickly assured himself – she wouldn’t like it if he was brooding.
Cordy was dead.
And she wasn’t coming back.
Not like himself. Or Spike. Or even Lindsey, come to that. They kept coming back, didn’t they ? Something was wrong when people like themselves, the monsters, kept on returning, when Cordy and Doyle weren’t there any more.
For some reason he had part of a song stuck in his head now. He wasn’t entirely sure where or how he’d heard it in the first place. He suspected it might have stuck in his head thanks to the time he annoyed Cordy by forgetting to rinse out his cups of blood. She’d promptly retaliated by playing non-stop classic 80’s tunes for a week. At volume.
Marlene watches from the wall
Her mocking smile says it all
As she records the rise and fall
Of every soldier passing
What was it that she’d said when they were watching that video of Doyle? “First soldier down.” And now she was the second. Given herself in the fight. Just another soldier lying on another battlefield.
She was going to be missed.
From the heartfelt gleeful jumping up and down to the way that she would slam down his reheated morning cups of blood. The way that she’d almost inhaled his lessons on fighting with that intent look in her eyes. Cuddling together with baby Connor, almost a family. Her infuriating filing system. The sheer venom and different amounts of sarcasm she could fit into the word “Boss”.
They could have been… maybe they should have been. But not now.
The others needed to know. Returning to the desk, he picked up the phone once more, and dialed a mobile number that he’d managed to learn by heart. Cordy would have been proud of him for that. Hell, she’d been proud when he’d learned to actually turn his mobile on.
“Wes? Put a Wolfram and Hart platinum card behind the bar. We’re going to have a wake.”
He paused. This was the hard part – actually admitting out loud what had happened. Knowing it himself in his heart was one thing, but saying it out loud?
“The hospital called. Cordy never came out of her coma.”
He hung up, and left his office. As he passed by Harmony’s desk, he could hear the phone start to ring again, but he ignored it and stepped into the elevator.
He’d been given another chance by Cordy. Set back on the right path again, and by god, he wasn’t going to waste this chance. All those bastards out there, the ones he made deals with, the ones he made deals for, the Senior Partners upstairs….they were going to have some nasty surprises coming their way very soon.
As the elevator arrived at the ground floor, the next verse of that song finally came to him.
But the only soldier now is me
I'm fighting things I cannot see
I think it's called my destiny
That I am changing
Not quite right for the situation. He still had close friends and fellow fighters to help him this time. And he wasn’t going to be stupid enough to cast them away this time.
But it was his destiny. His – not Spike’s.
And things were going to change.
She’d like that.
Angel isn’t going to brood – she wouldn’t like that. Set directly after “You’re Welcome”.