July 18th, 2006

Snoopy Magneto

The Real Reason Why Daleks and Cybermen Don’t Get On.... Part 2

Yeah, yeah... like I could really leave that set-up alone. A double drabble this time.

~ + ~

The Cyber Controller and the Emperor Dalek walked into a bar.

Well, the Cyber Controller walked in. The Emperor blew a hole in the wall, and glided in through that.

“Oi,” said the Sontaran behind the bar, “You’re paying for that, Emperor!”

The Emperor promptly exterminated him, only to sigh deeply when the next clone automatically popped up. “And yer paying for the new barman,” the new Sontaran said indignantly, and glared.

“SO,” said the Emperor, “YOUR CYBERLEADER STOOD UP OUR BLACK DALEK ON A DATE. THIS IS AN INSULT TO THE ENTIRE DALEK EMPIRE.”

“Eh, kids today,” said the Controller dismissively, ”Whatcha gonna do wit’ them? Can’t lock ‘em up, much as you want to. Hey, did I ever show you the pictures of him as a Cybermat?”

The Emperor’s eyestalk stared at him. “HAVE YOU BEEN ON THE WD-40 AGAIN? THIS IS ABOUT FAMILY, LOYALITY, RELIABILITY…”

There was a distinct clang as the Cyber Controller’s head hit the bar table, and a metallic snoring that strongly resembled a chainsaw.

Next morning, when the Cyber Controller woke up, there was a Yeti head in the bed with him. He studied it carefully. ”Of course, you know this means war….”
Snoopy Magneto

The Real Reason Why Daleks and Cybermen Don’t Get On.... Part 3

This is crack.

I should be sleeping by now. Next drabble!

~ + ~

Meanwhile, outside the bar, a quite different confrontation was brewing.

”Hey, Black," said the Cyberleader, sunlight gleaming nicely off his new paintjob, "Sorry for last night, but the Cybermen turned up late and I got dragged along while they invaded some planet in the Western Spiral Arm.”

The Black Dalek managed to sniff haughtily and direct her eyestalk anywhere but the Cyberleader.

One of the golden Daleks around her glided forward, placing herself between them. “LISTEN, BUSTER,” it began, “TALK TO THE PLUNGER, COS THE EYESTALK AIN’T LISTENING.”

The other two gold Daleks attempted a high five with their plungers.