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Sentimental yet sardonic [userpic]

Fic : Quotes That the Tenth Doctor Also Mangled

December 30th, 2005 (11:35 am)
content

current mood: content

Title: Quotes That the Tenth Doctor Also Mangled
Rating: 15(ish)
Setting: Doctor Who Season 2 somewhere
Summary: A selection of scenes from around the universe.
Characters: The Tenth Doctor, Rose and a cast of thousands.
Disclaimer: The BBC own all.





“Don’t do it,” the strange man warned the Marshal, “Don’t start a war just for the sake of your pride. Not when so many people could die as a result.”

The Marshal swung away from his place at the controls of the leading War Beast and stared in disgust at the man held between his guards. “Doctor, you do not understand!” he spat. “These Genosese scum have defiled Nictus Prime for the last ever time. Finally we shall wipe them out of existence! Here, at the Plains of Exetar, history will be made!”

“Oh, come on,” tutted the Doctor, slipping out of his coat with ease, and leaving the two guards behind him just holding the long brown coat. Stepping towards the Marshal, he pointed towards the east, where the sun was starting to rise, casting its light across the green and pleasant valley before them.

“Look at it!” he exclaimed, “Surely on a day like this, you should all be back home, with your families around you, preparing for summer. Look at it!”

The Marshal continued glaring at him. The Doctor rolled his eyes, flashed a quick grin at Rose, and carried on. "It's a beautiful day," he said earnestly before dropping his voice slightly, "Don't let it get away; It's a beautiful day!” His brow furrowed as he kept speaking “Touch me. Take me to that other place…..oh wait, that’s U2. Sorry.”

Rose put her head in her hand. “Not again…” she muttered.






“Excuse me, sir,” said one of the large, heavily armed guards at the exit of the market, “But we’d like a word with you concerning your slave.”

The Doctor looked at them with a surprised expression on his face. They continued standing there looking very large, very wide, and carrying very sharp swords. “Sorry, boys,” he said jauntily, “She’s not for sale.”

“If you’d just like to step over to the side sir, we can sort this out quietly,” suggested the leading guard. At least, Rose assumed he was the leading guard given the size of his helmet. Moving to the edge of the passage way, the normal ebb and flow of people entering and exiting the market re-started. Rose could feel the yes of the passing people flashing across them, before moving on rapidly. Even staring at a scantily clad harem girl for a moment wasn’t worth getting yourself noticed by the Sultan’s guards.

“And how can I be of service, officer?” asked the Doctor. “Surely I wasn’t going too fast through a built up area. I’m sure I would have noticed the cameras.”

The leading guard blinked, and said, in a tone used by guardsmen and police throughout history indicating that the person in question wasn’t as funny as they thought they were, “That’s as may be sir, but we’d like to examine your slave girl for identifying features.”

Rose opened her mouth to protest vigorously, but noticed the Doctor’s stare in time. Subsiding, she busied herself with thinking about just how she was never, ever going to mention this trip to her mother.

“The Sultan did report a stolen yellow-haired slave girl at 6am this morning sir,” continued the guard, taking out a piece of paper with what looked like a very close drawing of Rose on it.

“I assure you gentlemen,” the Doctor said, spreading his hands open in a friendly, honest manner, “I bought this slave off a bloke in a tavern down the market two days ago. This couldn’t possibly be the slave girl you’re looking for. Her name is… Alberta, she lives in Vancouver.”

The guards continued looking unimpressed.

"She cooks like my mother, and sucks like a Hoo…. oh wait, that’s Avenue Q. Sorry." The Doctor winced.

Despite wearing a slave girl’s outfit and being stuck in the Sultan’s harem for the last two days straight, to her amazement, Rose found she could still blush.

Comments

Posted by: Marcus L. Rowland (ffutures)
Posted at: December 30th, 2005 04:31 am (UTC)

Nyaaaaaaarrrrrgggghhhhh.

I fear that you will not be the only one to think of this type of thing.

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